I know

I know you’re comfortable
I know your there
In a place of order and disrepair
A space of your own
Holy and neat
Do you wonder?
Do you know?
Where I am now?
Where I sleep?
Do you care now?
Whose company I keep?
No I guess not
Because you never did
I wanted to forget
Who your were anyway
I wanted to remember once
but it hurt to bad
So I got real drunk and then real sad
Figured fuck it Ill move on
Sing my own song
Littered scratched and covered
In doubt of misunderstanding
It wont last I know
Now the bell has tolled
My time to be free
My time to love me.....
FenniganT……..4/29/10

Faux Real!

No not a piece
To consume whole
Flow into the scent
Steal the show
Fully immersed
Truly conversed
Automatically reversed
At full speed
Running free
Throughout the swirl
Spinning in and out
Tossed of any realm
Around the cosmos
Traveling here
Between another side
Deep and clear
Shallows skip more
Walls hold still
An open out door
To make faux real…….

FenniganT 4-6-10

A year on a page

One year ago
Zero hour
Head ringing
Vision blurred
Breath gone
Need air
Shaking heart breaking
Am I dying?
Walking dead
Shell shock
No sleep
No peace
Eyes wide shut
Still can’t see
Why what or whatever
Inner voice moved out
Emotionally dead
With out hope
For repair
90
Days later
Boots back on
Walking with fake strut
Hope no body notices
Continuously repeating
I am worthy
this to shall pass
you deserve happiness.
To find a way out.
Gotta heal
No storm last forever!
Pushing through each day
Boots weigh a ton
Hard to walk
No other choice
180
U turn?
Still cold
I try to imagine summer
Pray meditate eat
Am I gaining weight?
Three quarters through twelve months
Half the time I still feel I am faking it
Service to others is the only thing that feels right
I’m listening to people more
Open dialogue with god
Reading more is a good sign
Here I am one year later
What view
All I forgot
All I learned
All I knew
The only thing that matters
Love in service
A path of our own
A understanding that all is one
All vibes together
The purer the positive energy I receive and release
The more comes to me
Goal is now to open that valve full stream..............

Spark

A piece of light
A luminary in peace
A smile to brighten me
A spark in my daze
Like a shining star
In a world full of haze
A light from afar
A diamond amongst the ruins
A peace of perfection
A feather on a wing
The color of the sunset
The break of spring
A spark from you
Can fuel a life being…………